Getting your ex-boyfriend might be easy for some people and tough for others. There is no straight answer to it. Even there’s no guarantee that you will surely get them back. Other people in the community claim that reading this book or listening to this audio will 100% get your ex-boyfriend back, but in reality, they just want to sell their product.
This is something about love, and love cannot be controlled. However, there are plenty of ways with which you can increase your chances of getting your ex-boyfriend back.
This guide will be divided into 4 major steps, where we will discuss how to get your ex-boyfriend back.
Table of Content
- 1 Step 1 – Know why your relationship ended.
- 2 Step 2 – Cut your Ties
- 3 Step 3 – Update Yourself
- 4 Step 4 – Make contact again
Step 1 – Know why your relationship ended.
Before treating any disease, a doctor finds the cause of it. The same goes for relationships. You need to understand the primary reasons why your boyfriend left you. You need to find something concrete reasons and not something like, “ I said certain things to him or did few things he didn’t like, or he broke up with you because he found someone who was better and sexy looking than you. These are not the reason.
Valid reasons that can be the cause are
Reason 1 – It was always a Give-Give relationship and not Give and Take
This is 100% correct. This is also psychologically proved in human relations. If you gave too much for your boyfriend’s little efforts, then he’d be losing interest in you. There is nothing to fight for anymore. You are always overwhelmed by whatever he does, so it’s natural for him to lose interest in you.
Reason 2 – Clinginess and Insecurity
Ask anyone, and they would say that Clinginess and Insecurity are the two biggest factors why a relationship breaks. It kills all the attractions. It doesn’t matter how strong you guys are; any sign of clinginess can cause your boyfriend to cut ties with you.
Reason 3 – Monotony of the Relationship
In every relationship, there always comes a time when any of the partners stops making efforts. Due to this, the attraction of the relationship goes away, and signs of breakup appear.
Step 2 – Cut your Ties
This step may seem harsh and difficult for you to do, but this is the best step to make at that time. If you want to earn respect in your boyfriend’s eyes, then you need to get away from him, and for that ending, contact is necessary.
Just like a habit needs 21 days to develop, you need to end contact from your boyfriend for the next 21 days. No matter how much you are missing them, you cannot go back to him for this period at all. This is a psychological rule, and there is proof that it works. There are two major reasons for avoiding contact with your boyfriend.
Reason 1 – Stop looking Needy
When you end contact with your ex-boyfriend, it shows that you are not a needy person anymore, and you don’t need his support to move forward in life. This will also remove the “insecure” label from your head. As discussed above, insecurity and clinginess are the two biggest factors for breakups.
Reason 2 – Feeling of loss
When you avoid contact with your ex-boyfriend, this will create a feeling of loss in his mind. He will start thinking about why you are not calling him, and he might be desperate. He will start second-guessing his decision to break up with you. Once these feelings start to develop inside him, that is a good sign for you.
Step 3 – Update Yourself
The no contact period is difficult to handle for you; it’s a known reason. During this no contact period, the best thing you can do is to update yourself and keep yourself busy all day long.
Time to give up your old habits. If you are overweight or underweight, then it is time to hit the gym and get fit and change yourself. Appearance matters too much for some boys, if you are looking drop-dead gorgeous after a breakup, he will start regretting his decision of breaking up with you. Here are some things you can do while the No contact period.
Find a Hobby
Take a piece of paper and write down everything you wanted to do before you entered into a relationship. Pick one that looks the most interesting and attractive to you and starts doing it. This could be anything; you can do gardening or go for jogging in the morning or maybe even start pottery. It can be anything as long it is productive and keeps you busy.
Get Back To Work
You need to understand that sitting in your home inside your bed and crying all day long won’t help you get back to your ex-boyfriend. You need to get up and start working and focus on your energy to someplace else. Having a stable job or business can give you a great reason to make you get out of your house. It will keep you busy, and in the process, it will get rid of your old habits.
Step 4 – Make contact again
Now that you have changed yourself from inside out or at least you are starting to have your confidence back and the reason behind your breakup, it’s time to make contact! All the things you had done were for this day, and you are here to win back your relationship. Here are the things you need to be careful after you make contact again with your ex-boyfriend.
Maintain your calm
Don’t sound too excited when you talk to your ex again. You need to remain calm and no need to jump to conclusions and definitely do not use sentences like “ let’s get back together,” “ I can’t live without you,” etc.
We had already discussed things like insecurity and clinginess a bad sign. When you meet your ex after a long time, you need to brim with confidence that even astonishes your ex-boyfriend.
Call your Ex-Boyfriend
Now that the above things have been discussed, it’s time to call your ex. Keep the positivity and talk casually, nothing serious. After two-three calls, you can ask them to go out with you if possible—no need to force, if they are not comfortable, it’s okay.
Plan a “Date”
It is important to focus on this section, because if you mess this up, then there’s no going back. Do not open your wounds on the first date with your ex. Talk casually about the things you’ve been up to or even better, make him ask you what have you been up to. Just go out to grab some sandwiches or coffee.
After you’ve gone out for a while with your ex-boyfriend, it’s time for the deciding question. If your relationship had love, then your ex-boyfriend will get back to you. Love is never forgotten by heart, it may be hidden somewhere for a while, but it comes out sooner or later. When your ex-boyfriend sees all the efforts you have made in these past days or months, he will be impressed. He will understand that what he was missing out. If he still doesn’t get to you, then he is not for you!